Sizzler has fresh salad.
So Hank and I were eating at Sizzler’s tonight. I got the pepper, onion, and mushroom sirloin
with salad bar, and Hank just got the salad bar. So I finish my salad and start eating my
steak. Hank decides he’s had enough salad and goes for what he really wants, the chicken
wings. So here’s how we know the salad is really fresh.
I’m still eating my steak and Hank sits down. He’s got his chicken wings, but there’s still
a little salad from the plate before in his way. He looks down at his old plate and says,
“Hey, there’s a caterpillar in my salad.” And this wasn’t just any old caterpillar. This
wasn’t a dead caterpillar. This thing was alive and well, crawling around and eating the
spinach still on the plate. We told the waiter. Poor caterpillar. It’s probably dead now.
But Sizzler’s got some fresh salad.
Sprained ankle, busted lip, a beautiful face messed up.
At least I fixed my glasses, mostly.
Homer: Oh… This is the worst party ever.
Marge: I don’t know. You remember that New Year’s Eve at Lenny’s? He didn’t even have a clock.
Well, it’s about time. Mark this day on your calendars. The 27th of November
is the day. That day is day I will be getting my DSL. Oh yeah!
chriswong.org will be back to where it belongs.
Being Republican, the following will be a little biased, but I think we can
all agree there’s something suspicious here.
So we all still don’t know who will be President of the United States. And
we all know that they’re having problems down in Florida. And we probably
all know that in Palm Beach County there was this thing about a ballot being
confusing and all.
So here comes the news. The local ABC news network interviews this one lady
who is complaining about that she is certain she voted for the wrong
candidate and is demanding a revote. She also says that the only reason why
she came out to vote was to vote for Gore.
Now let me get this straight. The only reason you came out to vote was to
vote for Gore, and you just so happened to screw that up? One of two things
can be assumed about this person. She is either a) lying, or b) too damn
stupid to be voting anyways.
I’ve come to talk more about problems with the English language.
There other things that bother me about the English language than just the
monkeys/monkies matter. I just thought of this new word that bothers me.
invalid. Most of you probably know that there are two meanings for this word.
one definition is not holding validity. And the other is a sick person.
Having the two different meanings doesn’t bother me much. What bothers me is
the fact that they are pronounced differently. Okay… Two words spelled the
same, but pronounced differently. Something just ain’t right here.